To be more loving..
Yesterday night...well actually, THIS morning, Karen and I just had a good talk. From 10pm to 2am!!! (and one wonders why I wake up at unearthly hours like.. 11am. *grins*) Anyways, I was telling her about the visit to the Cheshire Home, and I was really touched by what she said - that I'm loving.
Well. Was thinking about it. What DOES it mean, to be loving? I know that when I see disadvantaged people, for instance the elderly, or the physically and intellectually disabled, I really feel compassion for them. I want to help them, to talk to them, to brighten up their days. I just want to use what I've been blessed with to bless them and to just .. try to be a light in their lives. And it's true, I don't get repulsed or shocked or offended or scared or what-not by these people that I want to help.. I speak to them, hug them, comfort them, support them, purely cos I've felt Jesus' love for me and I really want to spread it around too.
Okie, so yup. Maybe I AM loving to them. I don't know. .~shrugs~
But then, why can't I be more loving to most of the friends around me? Even my family? Is it because I see how much they have been blessed with, and how much joy they have in their lives already? Even when they're sad, or have some issues at hand, unless it's the special few that I really feel have a special connection with, most of the time I don't try to love them. Or rather, I don't love them in a gentle way - instead of listening and trying to understand, and supporting them, my love language in these cases consists more of practical steps to finding a long-term solution. And while I admit that sometimes this is not exactly the best way to try to love people, I have to say that I can see the potential in them. Compared to those born disabled, those without homes or families, the senile - they have so much more. They really have the potential to break free of their emotional wounds and conquer their hurts with the help of God. Yup. Maybe that's why when I'm dealing with these people, I tend to be impatient.. in pushing my own way across. I don't try to understand and see from their point of view. And THAT's not being loving.
Why was my motivation last night online exactly? Was it to support a fellow sister in Christ, as it should have been? Or merely just to get my point across and get others to agree with it? I'm afraid.. it was very much the latter. While my reasons for suggesting what I did were, I believe, not wrong - it was really WHY I suggested them that was not right. Thanks to Rimtimtim and Li-en who pointed me to that realisation.
Yup.. I can see now that it's in black and white..just how much more I need to learn. To grow in Christ's love. Sometimes one doesn't see how ugly she is, but I thank You, Lord, for showing me. For speaking to me day by day about just how sinful man is. Just how impatient and how unloving and prideful.. and how.. twisted.. one's motivations can get.
One more very good reminder to me, and to everyone reading:
1 Corinthians 13 -
"(1) If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. (Shucks that's me many times. Maybe I should just keep quiet like many others.) ... (3) If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have no love, I gain nothing. (4) Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way (SHUCKS AGAIN!!!!!! ARGHHHH.. so, so me.); it is not irritable or resentful..."
Lord, please change my heart! So that I learn not to judge, but to love everyone.
Okie, one last thought. For those who I've offended before or have been at the receiving end of my harsh love, this verse is for you guys. Luke 6:37 - "... forgive, and you will be forgiven."
Heh-heh. You know what to do. =)
Kailuo
Well. Was thinking about it. What DOES it mean, to be loving? I know that when I see disadvantaged people, for instance the elderly, or the physically and intellectually disabled, I really feel compassion for them. I want to help them, to talk to them, to brighten up their days. I just want to use what I've been blessed with to bless them and to just .. try to be a light in their lives. And it's true, I don't get repulsed or shocked or offended or scared or what-not by these people that I want to help.. I speak to them, hug them, comfort them, support them, purely cos I've felt Jesus' love for me and I really want to spread it around too.
Okie, so yup. Maybe I AM loving to them. I don't know. .~shrugs~
But then, why can't I be more loving to most of the friends around me? Even my family? Is it because I see how much they have been blessed with, and how much joy they have in their lives already? Even when they're sad, or have some issues at hand, unless it's the special few that I really feel have a special connection with, most of the time I don't try to love them. Or rather, I don't love them in a gentle way - instead of listening and trying to understand, and supporting them, my love language in these cases consists more of practical steps to finding a long-term solution. And while I admit that sometimes this is not exactly the best way to try to love people, I have to say that I can see the potential in them. Compared to those born disabled, those without homes or families, the senile - they have so much more. They really have the potential to break free of their emotional wounds and conquer their hurts with the help of God. Yup. Maybe that's why when I'm dealing with these people, I tend to be impatient.. in pushing my own way across. I don't try to understand and see from their point of view. And THAT's not being loving.
Why was my motivation last night online exactly? Was it to support a fellow sister in Christ, as it should have been? Or merely just to get my point across and get others to agree with it? I'm afraid.. it was very much the latter. While my reasons for suggesting what I did were, I believe, not wrong - it was really WHY I suggested them that was not right. Thanks to Rimtimtim and Li-en who pointed me to that realisation.
Yup.. I can see now that it's in black and white..just how much more I need to learn. To grow in Christ's love. Sometimes one doesn't see how ugly she is, but I thank You, Lord, for showing me. For speaking to me day by day about just how sinful man is. Just how impatient and how unloving and prideful.. and how.. twisted.. one's motivations can get.
One more very good reminder to me, and to everyone reading:
1 Corinthians 13 -
"(1) If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. (Shucks that's me many times. Maybe I should just keep quiet like many others.) ... (3) If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have no love, I gain nothing. (4) Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way (SHUCKS AGAIN!!!!!! ARGHHHH.. so, so me.); it is not irritable or resentful..."
Lord, please change my heart! So that I learn not to judge, but to love everyone.
Okie, one last thought. For those who I've offended before or have been at the receiving end of my harsh love, this verse is for you guys. Luke 6:37 - "... forgive, and you will be forgiven."
Heh-heh. You know what to do. =)
Kailuo
posted by Yellow Garfield at 1:04 PM
2 Comments:
I think the greatest love of all is loving thy neighbour as urself. Yes, loving one's enemy is nvr easy. Wich is all d more why forgiveness is the essence of true love. God's love for Man was beyond measure that he was willing to forgive and send Jesus to die for our sins.
As for being impatient and judgemental wif pple who have a thousand and one problems and yet r v. blessed, i can oni say, every1's situation is unique and d individual personality is different. We r in no position to conclude who suffers more-say disabled vs normal pple. Afterall, love is universal, and it shd be d same, irregardless of who d person is.
Dear Wendy
Yup.. that's why.. I need to really love more. Universally, as you said. =)
Thanks!
KL
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