Stuff.
Yup.
I'm tutoring Viki, going down almost religiously every Saturday, but it just doesn't seem to help.
I can't say how discouraged it is, trying to help this boy. It's not that he's lazy or stupid - cos he really is NOT. He's a bright boy who happens to be terrified of Maths. Some people do have Maths dyslexia, you know... I know he cannot help it. I know it's not that he doesn't want to do his homework - I know how paralysing fear can get. Imagine your greatest fears - for some people, it might be giant cockroaches, and just the thought of gigantic, humongous insects forces them into motionlessness. (Just a sidetrack:for these people, one quick way to get over your fear is to read the best story in the world about a man-turned-cockroach. ).
Anyways, I was saying. For Viki, Maths is the thing that gets him down. And it gets me down too, especially when I know I'm trying so hard and he's trying so hard and yet, he still somehow cannot manage even - Secondary 1 fractions.
Yup. Fractions. This is the third week we've been doing fractions - just reducing them to the simplest term, converting mixed numbers into improper fractions, and vice versa. For most of us, a piece of cake, easy-peasey lemon-squeezy. Not so for Viki. If you could see him, sitted there, forehead twisted in concentration, counting on his fingers to see if 5 + 8 = 13... then maybe we wouldn't be feeling so complacent about our ability in Maths, or any other academic work.
I really had tears in my eyes just now as I attempted to explain to him why 5/2 is equivalent to 2 and 1/2... mainly as I had done this, many times before. Tears of frustration, or impatience, or both. Tears of pity, I guess too.
Many Saturday mornings (well I've only been doing this 5 or 6 times, but I guess a large majority of these times) I've woken up not feeling at peace. I want to help Viki, sure. I struggle with waking up early just for Viki.. but I've managed to do it thus far. But what I cannot help hating the feeling I get when I reach there and just cannot help him solve his Maths problems. I know the fault doesn't lie with either of us but still.. this sense of defeat is really discouraging.
But God is still good. As I walked out from the Cheshire Home just now, head bowed, I started thinking. And thinking. And I think God's teaching me patience, using Viki.. He's teaching me about the dangers of complacency, and to be thankful for the blessings that I have - the fact that reducing fractions and that the multiplication tables (up to 12 that is) comes easily to me; for the fact that I don't have to count on my fingers when I solve Maths problems. And most importantly, God's teaching me how to love.
I guess my sense of frustration and of feeling discouragement is still with me.. but I also know that God's in control and that my strength lies with Him, and that I'll find peace within my Lord.
Lord, please teach me how to love.. and please let me find joy.. in You alone. Because the world is imperfect and sometimes people only discourage us.. but You alone are the source of our strength and encouragement.
Some random stuff-
By the way, does anyone know this - that a porcupine and a hedgehog are totally unrelated animals?
And does anyone think that I look like a koala bear? According to a poll of 3, THREE people think so...!!!!
I'm tutoring Viki, going down almost religiously every Saturday, but it just doesn't seem to help.
I can't say how discouraged it is, trying to help this boy. It's not that he's lazy or stupid - cos he really is NOT. He's a bright boy who happens to be terrified of Maths. Some people do have Maths dyslexia, you know... I know he cannot help it. I know it's not that he doesn't want to do his homework - I know how paralysing fear can get. Imagine your greatest fears - for some people, it might be giant cockroaches, and just the thought of gigantic, humongous insects forces them into motionlessness. (Just a sidetrack:for these people, one quick way to get over your fear is to read the best story in the world about a man-turned-cockroach. ).
Anyways, I was saying. For Viki, Maths is the thing that gets him down. And it gets me down too, especially when I know I'm trying so hard and he's trying so hard and yet, he still somehow cannot manage even - Secondary 1 fractions.
Yup. Fractions. This is the third week we've been doing fractions - just reducing them to the simplest term, converting mixed numbers into improper fractions, and vice versa. For most of us, a piece of cake, easy-peasey lemon-squeezy. Not so for Viki. If you could see him, sitted there, forehead twisted in concentration, counting on his fingers to see if 5 + 8 = 13... then maybe we wouldn't be feeling so complacent about our ability in Maths, or any other academic work.
I really had tears in my eyes just now as I attempted to explain to him why 5/2 is equivalent to 2 and 1/2... mainly as I had done this, many times before. Tears of frustration, or impatience, or both. Tears of pity, I guess too.
Many Saturday mornings (well I've only been doing this 5 or 6 times, but I guess a large majority of these times) I've woken up not feeling at peace. I want to help Viki, sure. I struggle with waking up early just for Viki.. but I've managed to do it thus far. But what I cannot help hating the feeling I get when I reach there and just cannot help him solve his Maths problems. I know the fault doesn't lie with either of us but still.. this sense of defeat is really discouraging.
But God is still good. As I walked out from the Cheshire Home just now, head bowed, I started thinking. And thinking. And I think God's teaching me patience, using Viki.. He's teaching me about the dangers of complacency, and to be thankful for the blessings that I have - the fact that reducing fractions and that the multiplication tables (up to 12 that is) comes easily to me; for the fact that I don't have to count on my fingers when I solve Maths problems. And most importantly, God's teaching me how to love.
I guess my sense of frustration and of feeling discouragement is still with me.. but I also know that God's in control and that my strength lies with Him, and that I'll find peace within my Lord.
Lord, please teach me how to love.. and please let me find joy.. in You alone. Because the world is imperfect and sometimes people only discourage us.. but You alone are the source of our strength and encouragement.
Some random stuff-
By the way, does anyone know this - that a porcupine and a hedgehog are totally unrelated animals?
And does anyone think that I look like a koala bear? According to a poll of 3, THREE people think so...!!!!
posted by Yellow Garfield at 8:28 PM
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