Another tiring day...
Yea yea, I realise my titles are getting boring... they all sound kinda alike, post after post after post. But well, it WAS a tiring day! So tiring that I K.O-ed straight away after reaching home in the afternoon.
Maybe it wasn't so much so the activities that we did that tired me out - after all, what was there? Church in the morning.. nope we didn't sing Tell the World so there wasn't any jumpin' around =p ; lunch after that at Heartland Mall; walked back to Tani after that for a talk about Missions Awareness and then straight home. Maybe it was the weather. But I'm more inclined to think it was the THINKING that tired me out.
"Think?" I hear you, yes, YOU, my dear reader, commenting incredulously. Well, surprisingly or not, I AM a human being, I DO have a brain (whether or not it's part of my body or just my mind.. haha.), and I DO think.
So many thoughts flittered through my mind. So many concerns. So many burdens. Shaz was so sweet (thanks Shaz!), she came up to ask me whether I was sad, despite her personal problems too.
It suddenly struck me just how busy I would be this semester. Not only doing the readings for the 5 modules I will be taking (and hopefully, doing well in!!!), but also agreeing to head the Publicity Comm for GEN 12, tuition for whoever AND whoever AND the YM-ers, and furthermore, catching up with friends, spending time with my poor, neglected family (oh well they seem to be doing all right without me, but you never know), Swordfighters the whole of Monday nights, and studying outside of the readings... suddenly, and amazingly, I was on the verge of one of those famous panic attacks that I'd heard about but never really experienced. Heh-heh.
But then I also realised - just how much this whole semester will just be laid in God's Hands. In His MIGHTY Hands! Yes! We need not have fear cos we're all conquerors and the children of the all-mighty God... as long as I lay it all on Him, and rest in Him, He will help me overcome everything! Yup, that's one thing I'm thankful to have realised and to be able to learn too, throughout this semester. =)
And I also thought about YOU. Do you know just how worried I am about you? How sad and torn... I get. When I see how you've turned away from Him, or at least, from seeking Him, when you were the first among us to accept Christ. I don't mean to preach, I really don't...neither am I of an holier-than-thou attitude and judgemental... I seriously do love you guys so much. But I will pray for you and Rain and the family. On my part too, I really have to remember to be a light that shines with God's love.. I know I don't really treat the 'rents as an obedient, loving daughter should, and that's something sad and to be changed too. Just to remind you of something - Romans 12: 1-2 says "... present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God... Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind..." We all need the reminder. =)
Well, yesterday already I'd wanted to go to school to get my readings (yesh yesh, I DO get my readings), but was thwarted. Well I'd thought of it today, but pushed it to the back of my mind; only when I heard that Hansel had gone did I feel that maybe I should have too. Nah, this isn't a competition thing, to see who's more hardworking; it was just that I really need to do my readings, more so than he does, I think. Well but I went for the talk in Tani, and boy, am I glad I did. It was totally mind blowing, to see how God's love has been shown to the people in poor and war-torn countries. The sharing by Maomao, Evan, Auntie Susan, Shawn, and Betty was especially poignant; just hearing about the children who had so little but were brightened up by small surprises and gestures just both choked my heart and lifted it. The smiles of the Cambodians in the video... the sincere prayer of those who'd accepted Christ.. it was all just so beautiful.
Joining GEN 12 has been something I'd prayed about. I knew that I'd much prefer doing humanitarian work to interacting with some aloof intellectual Uni undergrad (whom I can't out-argue, hmmph.. haha).. and also, because I have to take modules during the special semester and because I really want to go for church camp this year, I knew I would have to sign up for a short stint. Well God just answered my prayers! This morning I found out the actual dates of the church camp..and that it wouldn't interfere with either a trip to Cambodia OR to Thailand, under GEN 12. Hmm, now the question is, which to place as first choice. I do have fears that my parents will object.. but that is a hurdle I will cross with God's help when I get there.
I also realised today while complaining about the lack of cheese in my nacho cheese gordita that - hey!! We have loads of cheese in the fridge (selected and purchased by yours truly) that has not been eaten and that is going to expire soon. Authentic, unpasterized Cheddar and Old Gouda (I only go for the old, STRONG ones) and grated Parmesan and what-not... I'd better start enjoying them soon. But truly, I don't feel like eating most of the time when I'm home - except if dinner's PIZZA! (or instant ramen. Haha)
I also thought about..something else. The same old, same old. But the answer to THAT, I believe God has said, is to wait. And to be patient.
These concerns are things I've really been thinking bout for very long.. just that somehow they've not been pushed so closed together at the same time, and so far to the front of my mind for a long time.
Someone asked me the other day - I believe it was Chris or Hansel - whether I ever get sad. And if so, how it's manifested, since I'm almost always bouncy and happy and beaming to the whole world.
Uhm, I think it's enough to say that if you see me deep in thought and not speaking.. I feel either VERY tired.. or just burdened. Maybe not sad, exactly. But burdened, yup.
Yay! Pizza for dinner! The cheesy, lava-stuffed one. Yum yum..
~Kailuo~
Maybe it wasn't so much so the activities that we did that tired me out - after all, what was there? Church in the morning.. nope we didn't sing Tell the World so there wasn't any jumpin' around =p ; lunch after that at Heartland Mall; walked back to Tani after that for a talk about Missions Awareness and then straight home. Maybe it was the weather. But I'm more inclined to think it was the THINKING that tired me out.
"Think?" I hear you, yes, YOU, my dear reader, commenting incredulously. Well, surprisingly or not, I AM a human being, I DO have a brain (whether or not it's part of my body or just my mind.. haha.), and I DO think.
So many thoughts flittered through my mind. So many concerns. So many burdens. Shaz was so sweet (thanks Shaz!), she came up to ask me whether I was sad, despite her personal problems too.
It suddenly struck me just how busy I would be this semester. Not only doing the readings for the 5 modules I will be taking (and hopefully, doing well in!!!), but also agreeing to head the Publicity Comm for GEN 12, tuition for whoever AND whoever AND the YM-ers, and furthermore, catching up with friends, spending time with my poor, neglected family (oh well they seem to be doing all right without me, but you never know), Swordfighters the whole of Monday nights, and studying outside of the readings... suddenly, and amazingly, I was on the verge of one of those famous panic attacks that I'd heard about but never really experienced. Heh-heh.
But then I also realised - just how much this whole semester will just be laid in God's Hands. In His MIGHTY Hands! Yes! We need not have fear cos we're all conquerors and the children of the all-mighty God... as long as I lay it all on Him, and rest in Him, He will help me overcome everything! Yup, that's one thing I'm thankful to have realised and to be able to learn too, throughout this semester. =)
And I also thought about YOU. Do you know just how worried I am about you? How sad and torn... I get. When I see how you've turned away from Him, or at least, from seeking Him, when you were the first among us to accept Christ. I don't mean to preach, I really don't...neither am I of an holier-than-thou attitude and judgemental... I seriously do love you guys so much. But I will pray for you and Rain and the family. On my part too, I really have to remember to be a light that shines with God's love.. I know I don't really treat the 'rents as an obedient, loving daughter should, and that's something sad and to be changed too. Just to remind you of something - Romans 12: 1-2 says "... present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God... Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind..." We all need the reminder. =)
Well, yesterday already I'd wanted to go to school to get my readings (yesh yesh, I DO get my readings), but was thwarted. Well I'd thought of it today, but pushed it to the back of my mind; only when I heard that Hansel had gone did I feel that maybe I should have too. Nah, this isn't a competition thing, to see who's more hardworking; it was just that I really need to do my readings, more so than he does, I think. Well but I went for the talk in Tani, and boy, am I glad I did. It was totally mind blowing, to see how God's love has been shown to the people in poor and war-torn countries. The sharing by Maomao, Evan, Auntie Susan, Shawn, and Betty was especially poignant; just hearing about the children who had so little but were brightened up by small surprises and gestures just both choked my heart and lifted it. The smiles of the Cambodians in the video... the sincere prayer of those who'd accepted Christ.. it was all just so beautiful.
Joining GEN 12 has been something I'd prayed about. I knew that I'd much prefer doing humanitarian work to interacting with some aloof intellectual Uni undergrad (whom I can't out-argue, hmmph.. haha).. and also, because I have to take modules during the special semester and because I really want to go for church camp this year, I knew I would have to sign up for a short stint. Well God just answered my prayers! This morning I found out the actual dates of the church camp..and that it wouldn't interfere with either a trip to Cambodia OR to Thailand, under GEN 12. Hmm, now the question is, which to place as first choice. I do have fears that my parents will object.. but that is a hurdle I will cross with God's help when I get there.
I also realised today while complaining about the lack of cheese in my nacho cheese gordita that - hey!! We have loads of cheese in the fridge (selected and purchased by yours truly) that has not been eaten and that is going to expire soon. Authentic, unpasterized Cheddar and Old Gouda (I only go for the old, STRONG ones) and grated Parmesan and what-not... I'd better start enjoying them soon. But truly, I don't feel like eating most of the time when I'm home - except if dinner's PIZZA! (or instant ramen. Haha)
I also thought about..something else. The same old, same old. But the answer to THAT, I believe God has said, is to wait. And to be patient.
These concerns are things I've really been thinking bout for very long.. just that somehow they've not been pushed so closed together at the same time, and so far to the front of my mind for a long time.
Someone asked me the other day - I believe it was Chris or Hansel - whether I ever get sad. And if so, how it's manifested, since I'm almost always bouncy and happy and beaming to the whole world.
Uhm, I think it's enough to say that if you see me deep in thought and not speaking.. I feel either VERY tired.. or just burdened. Maybe not sad, exactly. But burdened, yup.
Yay! Pizza for dinner! The cheesy, lava-stuffed one. Yum yum..
~Kailuo~
posted by Yellow Garfield at 8:18 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home